Archive for April, 2009

Unbiased Opinions

In the process of writing my book I have been sending work to a talented and dear writer friend of mine Dale to review.
It is hard to know what to include in my book and what to just leave in the drawer,what will move people and what is useless.
It is also sometimes impossible to know if friends are just being kind,or if collegues are being polite when they say "wow that peice you wrote is amazing".
Today, after reading the latest work I sent to gim entitled "Paper Dolls" Dale sent me the following comments.Dale has also provided me with some unbiased opinions on a peice I wrote recently entitled "The Art Of Being Lost"
If you have time, read it and e-mail me YOUR thoughts, I would love to hear them and perhaps I will add this one to my beloved book.
Re: Paper Dolls‏
From: dale barnes 
Sent: Tuesday, 28 April 2009 9:19:51 PM
To: Dark Angel . (essentialsoulpoetry@hotmail.com)
This is wonderful. I read it and again, and then each line from the bottom up…I love it both ways…Ahhh to be a paper doll….Keep em coming my friend…response to that other poem of yours I posted on Multiply includes tears by the readers in their comments!!! Come have a look! PILO

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I hate Mondays
I can never see my desk…
Perhaps this is karma for persisting in resisting working Fridays
I’m not sure…
I am exhausted..
I have a headache..
My neck aches…
I woke up feeling unwell..
Yesterday AND today
I will spend Tuesday telling myself I am not getting the flu 😦
Thankfully Monday is almost over…

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When I was a little girl I made a scrapbook
It still has that much loved paper doll with the sticky taped head in it
It’s sad for me now to look back and realise that she was my best friend
Actually she was really my only friend
Smiling laughing happy children in the playground had no time no rhyme and certainly (lucky for them) no reason to want to understand the pale quiet little girl that barely spoke and wore her cardigan all through the heat of summer.
Solace was a place I could draw and write and create paper friends
Sometimes even now I need to go there
I reach out for love for understanding and .. I dont know, something, anything
I guess at the end of the day nothing has changed very much
I am glad I  still have her for when my heart aches and I am lonely
I need to learn that the way I love is probably not the way to be
I should be used to being alone..yet I came to rely on something other than her painted smile
I should laminate her completely
Yet that seems so strange and too modern for a far away world
I no longer have to cover bruises on the outside
I am thankful for this
As I lay on my bed and turn the pages I am thankful for many things
Why then
Am I  so sad….

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I think I’m gonna go home soon….

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When I look back at things I have written
It seems easy to understand why so many people would think I am crazy
I long gave up trying to explain..
Once long ago ….
I think in Grade ten English she asked me to explain something she had given me an A+ for
I thought to myself….
I did not mark this paper you did
I never claimed it as a masterpeice
It was simply a peice of my heart I shared
You have given me an A+ for something you don’t even understand ?
I probably am crazy…
For I will NEVER understand that
I stood there silently in front of them
I squirmed as they snickered
in my life…
Nothing has changed
I no longer get the grades
But I still have no idea how to explain myself…

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I angst over the longevity of love
It was a word you used once
I don’t like it now…
It sits like fear upon the fence
A black cat about to pounce
The deeper we love the more we have to lose
Fairytales were always so much easier to read
We are sweeter than this
Says my heart ….

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Laying Down

I lay down under the anguish coated sky
It dreams of sun
As it pours with rain
In my dreams it used to wash away that blood stain
The one embedded in that old style concrete
I hated it so
Yet did it ever really exist except in my mind ?
I ran my hand along that old guitar
I let four notes fall across my lips
That song I wrote…
I could make you feel beautiful
The sky whispered
And wondered how long it should stay silent
I lay quietly feeling lost
I promised forever
After all

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